Posts Tagged ‘fall again’
Iulius’09 – The scarf
Posted on: July 14, 2009
Harry walks on the small, silent road, which led to the Matryoska station…
-What weird person – he thought – That style of hair and the way she talks, weird…
Well, weird, he must say, but also interesting, he must admit. The train came. He stepped on and went home…
That’s all the details that Harry can remember about the thoughts in his mind after meeting her, a girl has just moved in the area and started studying at his school this year.
The first term went alright, everything seems to be normal. He didn’t notice her much because he still thought she was weird and a bit conceited.
-Well – he thought – To be that talented in a class full of average people, you can’t help being a bit conceited even if you are the most modest person in the world.
However, Harry himself is also a modest person and he hated everyone who is pompous or even looks like they were conceited people. Conceit has never ever been in his policy since he was a child and he’s always proud of that.
The problem starts to develop in the second term when he starts to like the new girl, which has been called The Girl by him every time he talked with his friend about her. Harry didn’t know where or when these feelings come from, but they are like ghosts suddenly appear and haunted his life. He couldn’t stop thinking about her…
The winter comes. The Matryoska station has begun to fill with different colours from several scarves and beanies of students who took the same line to go home. Winter has added beautiful colours into the boring background of the station and the humdrum tones of the school uniform that students have to wear everyday. Harry always likes winter, it’s lonely but it gave him peace in his mind. He likes snow. Unfortunately, snow never appears here because the weather is never cold enough to have snow. However, it’s still cold. The Girl, of course, changed her clothes to winter style, and in his life, he has never seen anyone cuter than her. She wears the small, dark-coloured beanie that made him think about French girl who are throwing snow balls on the yard in the winter.
-Nice beanie – he managed to say to her once
-Thanks – she replied with joy – I made it myself
-Wow, you know how to knit?
-My mom taught me. I used to knit some to give my friends as birthday presents.
-Wow, you really knows a lot – he smiled at her
Since then, he dreamed about when his birthday came, he will have a beanie which is knitted by her… and of course, that present has never been given…
One special thing that he likes about her winter clothes is her scarf. It is a normal scarf, but somehow when she put it on, it also become special and looks much more elegant. He likes the scarf, or more exactly, he likes the scarf’s owner…
She wears the scarf almost everyday she went to school. She even wears it in class when she said next to Harry. From the scarf, a special fragrance spreads out. It was a very dim, calm odour that he likes very much. He inhales in that odour so much that the fragrance stayed in his mind and he got so used to it that when she came into the classroom, he knows without even looking up.
-You should tell her, man – A friend of him said – Just tell her that you like her!
-Nah, she would just run away from me, hahaha – he replied with a laugh.
Harry always thought that telling her would be the last thing he did and he believed if The Girl also likes him, she would know…
The year gradually passes. Everyday, he went to school to see The Girl, who had not even a slightly idea about his feeling, talking in the most carefree way to her friends. He started to think about if he likes her or he just simply had a crush on her, or maybe he was only impressed by her talent… but does it matter? Isn’t it true that you have like someone because of some of their good aspects that you see in them? It doesn’t matter then, he just likes her, that’s all.
The end came, which means the year ends and everyone was getting excited about the Prom night.
After the encouragement of his best friends, he approached The Girl, who was sitting alone in one of the rare sunlight day of winter, and who is looking as beautiful as she can be in Harry’s eyes at the time.
-Hey, I just wondering, would you be my partner to the Prom?
She looked at him, confused. At that very moment, Harry thought that he saw her flushed a bit. Harry gathered his confidence and look straight at her in her blue eyes…
She smiled… then…
-I’m very glad that you asked… – She began finally
Harry’s heart jumped up
-…But I’m sorry… I can’t go with you – She then continued
His heart fell down…
-Uhm… why? – He dared to ask her that, he didn’t have anything else to lose anyway
-Well… you see… I’m gonna go with my group of friends and none of them has a partner so… – she shrugged – But thanks for asking. It’s very sweet of you to ask…
-Well, ok… thanks anyway – He replied shortly then when into the class without looking back.
He has been refused, the very first refuse from the very first girl that he dared to ask in his life… It’s kind of sad, and in fact, it’s extremely sad for him at the moment. Harry thought that she would accept the invitation and she even accepted it in his dream. But the truth has never been easy to face. And at that very moment, The Girl is still wearing the scarf with the calm, mild fragrance…
Harry’s class has a farewell party near the end of the year, which is about more than a month since the sad event. The Girl has retured to her carefree personalities, in fact, Harry knew that she was not affected even a bit about the event, so contrast with him, who was so sad and depressed after the refuse she gave him…
In the party, she introduced the class with one of her friend who came to visit her from her hometown. Harry didn’t remember the boy’s name, and he didn’t even want to remember his name. The party was very fun for him until everyone starts to discuss about the Prom and their partners. Something unexpected has happened in that very normal day.
-Hey, who is your partner? – a friend in class asked The Girl
Harry’s heart once more jumped up but then he already knew her answer so he didn’t even look at her at that moment… but then he has to look up, straight into her face…
-Well, it’s my friend here, I decided to bring him – She pointed to the boy.
What? Harry thought. Does she even know that I am sitting right here? No, wait. Does she even remember her own answer a month ago? A stream of anger rose from deep inside Harry. What is she doing? Harry has never felt an anger like that in his life. What the f*** is she doing?
He felt betrayed!
Harry’s class is a small one, so everyone is very closed with each other and everyone knew about his invitation to The Girl, and everyone even knows his feeling for her (except herself of course). At the very minute, right after her answered, Harry saw everyone was staring at his direction. One of his friend next to him, a girl, even asked him “ Are you ok, Harry?”. He didn’t answer, he scared that if he opened his mouth, it wouldn’t be a proper answer at all but it would turn into a rage.
The Girl never knew what had happened at the party.
He walked home that day with the anger never subsided.
He deleted everything about her, her number, everything…
The Prom night came… The Girl appeared in the dress that has the same colour as her scarf, the fragrant scarf. It has been another month since that horrible party of him, that odour is now nothing to him anymore. He didn’t even felt a bit emotion when he inhaled it. He still smiled at her when she said hi to him, but the smile didn’t have its true meaning like before, it’s just a socialized smile, a less than normal smile, a smile without even a bit meaning in it.
He never saw The Girl again after the Prom night. She has moved back to her hometown…
He decided to forget her… and won’t let her know his feeling…
And the scarf… Harry sure that the scarf is still keeping her fragrance in it… at this very moment… a calm, mild odour that has swept through his life… like a soft breeze… gone forever…
FALL AGAIN – Glenn Lewis
Feels like a fire that burns in my heart
Every single moment that we spend apart
I need you around for every day to start
I haven’t left you alone
There’s something about you, I stare in your eyes
And everything I’m looking for I seem to find
All this time away is killing me inside
I need your love in my life
I wanna spend time till it ends
I wanna fall in you again
Like we did when we first met
I wanna fall with you again
Ohhhh (etc.)
We fought in a battle, nobody one
And now we face a mountain to be overcome
You can’t turn away, the past is said and done
I need us to carry on
I wanna spend time till it ends
I wanna fall with you again
Like we did when we first met
I wanna fall with you again
la la la la la, whoa (etc.)
You’ll try everything you never thought would work before
When you live, when you love, and you give them your all
You can always give up some more
Baby nothing means anything unless you’re here to share with me
I can breathe, I can bleed, I can die in my sleep
Cause you’re always there in my dreams
I wanna spend time till it ends
I wanna fall with you again
Like we did when we first met
I wanna fall with you again
I wanna spend time till it ends
I wanna fall with you again
Like we did when we first met
I wanna fall with you again
Ohh, la la la (etc.)
You again
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